Sunday, June 9, 2024

The King's Problem Daughter: A Historical Parable

 The King’s Problem Daughter

A historical parable by Joe Petrulionis




In a place now deserted, just fields of rubble on sheep wandered hills, once a kingdom called Falatid controlled the villages and settlements as far in any direction as a horse could carry a rider in one day. Not a large kingdom, others on its borders were larger, some could boast more warriors in the field, but Falatid had somehow attained a balance between population and agricultural production, supporting just enough of a military to make neighboring realms think twice about invasion...Falatidan soldiers would fight like demons for home and country. For a few generations, it seemed an ideal little kingdom. 


In the family succession of rulers, King Alfred the Second, governed according to the patterns laid down by his father and grandfather. The people could elect their local council and mayor. Taxes remained a small one part in twenty-five, much lower than in any other bordering kingdoms. Soldiers were not conscripted but hired. A military life was a profitable alternative to the agriculture and tradecraft practiced by most of King Alfred’s subjects. So talented recruits trained with their eyes on advancement. The kingdom used its tax levy for three purposes: the cost of the military, the cost of maintaining a rudimentary system of roads between the villages and the costs of the King, his family, several advisors, and seasoned diplomats. The efficiency of this governance kept the king out of debt and the people protected from external threats. 


In most ways, the villagers and farmers could direct their own lives without much interference from the Court. But during the rule of King Alfred the Second, the king had become persuaded that his kingdom must be unified in religious beliefs for several reasons, including preserving the divine right to rule that his family had enjoyed, and to make it easier to attract alliances in any future war.  So during the thirty-second year of his rule, King Alfred proclaimed his kingdom to be a Christian kingdom, demanding that all places of worship become Roman Catholic and every soldier applicant a baptized Christian. 


The unprecedented grumbling these edicts caused reached the ears of the King. He considered retracting his new laws, but was counseled by his closest advisers that this would make him look weak and beholden to his subjects demands.  His own son, Prince Alfred, told his father that the religion of the kingdom was one of the King’s prerogatives. The population must be converted if only to teach their subjects how to obey the laws of the land. The Prince wanted to head a military expedition from village to village, demanding and forcing each person to take a loyalty oath and to undergo the rite of baptism in the public square. Anyone resisting would be exiled with only the possessions they could carry on their backs. Livestock, housing, and the family food plots would be confiscated and given back to the common holdings of the village. 


As his son spoke, the King observed the faces of his other counselors. Most were looking down quietly, unwilling to disagree with the crown prince given what they knew to be his short temper and unwillingness to be contradicted. So when the King asked if there were any other opinions, he received no reply. 


But in the back of the throne room, Prince Alfred’s twin sister, Princess Sofia, had been working at her embroidery while listening to the proceedings. She had never before participated in the discussions in court, but she rarely missed being there in the back, listening carefully. So everyone was surprised to hear her voice asking, “Father may I address you on this matter?” 


The King did not answer, but peered into the darkness of the back of the room. Sofia used this break in the conversation to speak. “Father, I am sure your people will follow your just directives since they have always been well reasoned and aimed at the good fortune of your subjects. I respectfully ask you to be certain of both the justice of these new laws and the reasonable logic behind them.” 


The court was silent for twenty seconds or more. Then Prince Alfred raised his voice a pitch or two and said, “sister you have not been asked to speak in court. Go back to your rooms and concern yourself with things you understand.” 


The Princess ignored her brother’s outburst and continued. “Father, I have a plan to test the justice and reason behind your religious conversion edicts. May I explain?”


To the astonishment of all present, the King said, “ yes daughter. We have learned to appreciate the private counsels you have provided. Tell us about this plan.” 


As Princess Sofia walked towards her father’s seat of power, she explained, "Father, I am a dutiful daughter. If you or the wisest Christian theologians can answer one of my five questions with a just and reasonable answer, I will, myself, convert to Christianity and lead a devout and Christian life. But if no just and reasonable answer might be given, then I will continue to withhold judgment on both religion and the Christian variety. The test I recommend must be just, so there can be no coercion of the judges, not by any King, Prince, or other state power. The test must be reasonable so it must be judged by ten of the wisest logicians in the land. I will ask five questions. Anyone, including the wise judges present, may answer them.  If a majority of the counselors agree that any one of those five questions have been reasonably answered, then I will assent to my own conversion to Christianity. Oh, and five of the judges will come from the Christian Faith. Five will not.” 


The king asked for comments from his advisors present, who were waiting to see what the King thought before answering. So the advisors did not offer advice.  The Crown Prince wanted to speak, but the king held up his hand to silence him, saying “My son, you shall have the privilege of determining the five Christian members of the judges for the test. Your sister will select the non-Christian Judges.” 


Then a date was selected for the test and the process of finding and interviewing judges for the panel commenced. 


The upcoming test of the edicts became the talk of the Kingdom. “What five questions could Princess Sofia be so confident in that she would wager our individual rights to free choice of doctrine?” Soon it became obvious that there would be many subjects interested enough to make the trip to Falatid City to watch the proceedings. Inquiries from foreign travelers, asking for permission to attend were also being received.  The venue for the test was moved to the jousting field in an attempt to provide ample space for the expected observers. 


On the day of the test, more observers than had ever been assembled in Falatid City were in the jousting field, many had been camping there for a day or more. The pavilion which for jousts held the audience, had been set up with two seats in the middle and with five seats on each side. At the far sides were seats for visiting mayors and a section set off for the Royal family. 


At noon, the ten judges walked in to stand by their respective seats, five on the audience's right being the Christian judges and five on the audience’s left being the Non Christian judges. Then entered Princess Sofia, to warm applause from the crowd. Next came the Master of Ceremony who sat next to the Princess, followed by the Royal Family and then the Crown Prince and King. Once the King was seated; everyone else took their seats. 


The Master of Ceremony stood to welcome the observers and to thank God for the beautiful weather. He then thanked the King for holding this test and declared this a gesture of the King to ensure all of his laws were just and reasonable, as has always been the King’s way of governing. 


Then the Master of Ceremony introduced the judges. The first five were theologians, schooled in the advanced dogma of the Christian Church, from the Neoplatonists all the way down the ages to the Scholastic Cardinals in Rome who made the fine adjustments to doctrine as necessary. Several of these were Jesuit Brothers, specialists in rooting out errors in logic that might result in negligent interpretation of creed. One was a bishop, who would later be advanced to Cardinal. 


On the other side of the panel sat four professors and a Rabbi, all but the Rabbi from outside the Kingdom. Three of these were scholars specializing in logic. With them was a philosophy professor who specialized in such historical figures as Averroes, Augustine, and Maimonides. On the edge of these seats sat an older Rabbi, known to many of the Jewish population who were in attendance that day. Rabbi David had been hounded out of several cities in distant kingdoms, spending all of his life exiled from his homeland. 


Much leaning forward to see the other panel occurred. As a judge's name was mentioned, several from the other panel sought to put a face with a reputation. Sometimes, smiles were passed and too often, rolling of eyes or even scowls could be seen. The names of the judges had been strict secrets until that moment. Even the judges did not know who they would be up against until those introductions were made. 


 The Master of Ceremony read the rules of the test and then explained carefully the most important requirements.  The Princess would ask one question at a time. Anyone who thought they had a just and reasonable answer could raise their hands. Their answers would be considered, one at a time, and then answered by the Princess. Then they would be tested by the full ten judges. If a majority of judges agreed that the answer was both just and reasonable then the answer would be accepted. If but one of the Princess's five questions were judged to be justly and reasonably answered then the King’s religious edicts would come into force. The Kingdom of Falatid would join most of its neighbors as a Christian kingdom, the population would be forced to convert or choose exile, and the country would receive a bishop from Rome to oversee the proper administration of local churches. 


Many in the crowd that day enjoyed the prospect of living in a Christian kingdom. These people seemed very confident that they had many just and reasonable reasons to support their choice of faith, so they looked forward to the day’s festivities. Many others among them seemed worried that so many of their rights had been wagered on the young Princess's abilities to devise just five questions to test such a complex question. Many of these were outraged by the presence of Rabbi David, a known religious leader, on the panel. Why had the Princess included a religious man on her side of the judgment panel? The murmuring of the crowd could not be assigned to either group but certainly indicated their interest in the test and its outcome. 


Just five questions, but so many people who might provide answers. The test promised to be long and tedious. So the crowd slowly settled into their seats and quieted to hear the arguments. 


The Princess stood and smiled at the crowds. There were no boos or obvious signs of disrespect, and many appreciative cheers. She turned and curtsied low to her Father, seated in his traditional seat next to her brother, just behind the seats that had been fashioned for her and the Master of Ceremony. Her only eye contact, before and after the knee bend, was to her father, a slight not lost on her brother. Then she curtsied to the left most panel of judges, then to the right panel. Finally, in a move unprecedented in any memory present, she turned and curtsied the crowd, which jumped to its feet and applauded. 


Then in a voice louder than anyone had expected, she erupted into the heart of the test, with her first question. “I respectfully submit my first question. Why is the idea of a beginning, a moment before which time began, and after which time rolled on until today, why is that a logical concept?” 


Hundreds of people stood, some jumping up and down with their hands in the air, gleefully hoping to be chosen to answer such a simple question. The Master of Ceremony asked a young man near the front of the crowd to answer and asked the crowd to please quiet down so he could be heard.  The young man seemed confident that his answer to this first easy question would make him famous, perhaps even ease his way into one of the new positions of church leadership. So he struck a serious pose and waited for silence, then spoke, “My Lord, the very first words in the Holy Scriptures remind us that there was a beginning. The Scriptures are the infallible word of God and there is no more just and reasonable source than God to guide human logic.” 


After a moment of cheering and moaning from the crowd, the Master of Ceremony restored order and turned to Sofia.  The Princess said that this only seemed like a just answer. So everyone who had an answer depending on the authority of the Holy Bible could please be seated as we explore the reasonableness of that answer. By far, the majority of those standing then returned to their seats. 


Once the rustling subsided, Sofia continued, “We trust the Holy Bible because it is the word of God. And we know all we know about God, because it is in the Holy Bible. This is a circular form of reasoning that might seem convincing to some. But there are more ancient scriptures in languages that have passed from this world that have claimed to be dictated by immortal gods. Should we believe in unicorns, muses, and dragons because of those scriptures?” 


As Sofia took her seat, the learned panels of judges were already chatting among themselves. Directly, the Master of Ceremony queried the two groups.  All five of the judges on the right voted in favor of the answer. All five of the judges on the left voted that the answer was circular in its reasoning and thus illogical. With no majority, the Master of Ceremony asked for other answers.  


Some of the answers were rather simplistic. One young man, a carpenter from a nearby town,  suggested that “everything has a beginning. Every human, every plant and animal, even a chair has a beginning in the shop of its creator. “


The Princess stood and treated his question as kindly as she could, “Perhaps you are right in redefining the word beginning to mean a new thing formed from older things. Like a chair being formed from a tree, or a tree emerging from the acorn of another tree, or that other tree emerging from an older seed. Perhaps that redefinition could be convincing to some. But my question asked about a time before which there was no time. Sadly, friend, your answer does not touch on that question.” 


More chattering among the two panels could be heard. Then again the Master of Ceremony called for votes. Five from the right agreed with the answer. Five from the left disagreed that this was a logical answer. With no majority, the Master of Ceremony asked everyone with a similar argument to please sit down. But there still stood a few brave souls willing to test their wits, with new answers, against the best logicians in the land. 


One of these answers, submitted by His Grace, Crown Prince Alfred, himself, caused much heated debate among the two panels of judges. The prince stood and submitted the answer as if it were itself beyond any test of logic or reason. “The law and order of the Kingdom of Falatid is the holy responsibility of the King. If that king should determine the safety of the kingdom depends on the unity of religious belief, then the subjects of that realm must conform. It is the will of God.” 


The Princess, his twin sister, stood to address the answer. Perhaps no one else in the world could have been so sharp in answering the Crown Prince. But she smiled in his direction, thanked him for his submitted attempt to answer and said, “Brother, your answer is to an unasked question about the prerogatives of the King.  Please remember, there has been much discussed since my question, I know it might be confusing. But my question related to the idea of “the beginning” a time before which there was nothing, not even time itself.  Your submitted answer relates to the powers of an anointed King, serving God as the ruler of the realm. The King himself, wanting to assure himself about the justice and reasonableness of his religious edicts,  agreed to this test. We are, just to remind you dear brother, testing those two things. Is it just to use the force of a state to coerce its subjects to hold a particular religious belief? Is it reasonable to choose the Christian faith as the one doctrine to be forced on a population? Since that is what we are doing here today I would humbly ask you to resubmit your answer to my question, this time keeping to the topic of a beginning?”


But the Crown Prince did not seem to hear her. He was receiving a large bowl of wine from a servant, while smiling at something said by the empty seat to his side. When the votes were taken among the judges, five of those seated on the right found the Prince’s answer to be just and reasonable. The Rabbi who had a rare form of personal courage, since he was the only member of his group of judges that actually lived in the realm, found the question to be both unjust and unreasonable. With no majority the attempted answers to the first question continued. 


One person submitted an answer taken straight from the Ancient Greek Philosopher. “Every event comes from some condition that precedes that event. That condition itself, springs from a prior condition. This chain of conditions, causes and effects, can be traced back in time until the original event, the uncaused cause, the beginning.” 


This answer seemed reasonable to most, at least until The Princess pointed out that the first part of the answer could not be true if the second part were also true.  “If,” she insisted, “there had to be a cause for every effect, then there could be no uncaused cause, could there?” 


The right panel of Judges looked stunned, “But Aristotle…” could be heard as almost an invocation being mouthed by the right panel. 


When the votes were taken, on this and the remaining attempted answers, five from the right voted in favor and five from the left voted against accepting the answer. Not one answer to the Princess's first question had won a majority. 


On the far right of the panel of Christian Judges, an increasingly agitated scholastic stood to ask a question of the competing panel. Though not contemplated in the rules for this cross talk to occur, none present would stop him. So he asked, “How and why a leader of the Jewish religion would be unwilling to acknowledge a beginning to all things.” Also as his long winded and not so charitable question began to reach its end, he submitted that “these religious edicts being tested here today are matters between the King and the Christian Church to decide. Why would a rabbi be included in these discussions at all?” 


Rabbi David stiffly stood to make an answer.  His voice, so quiet that the crowd strained to listen, explained himself. “To my learned brothers on the opposite panel, I want to thank you for the opportunity to explain my answer about the beginning of all things. I will tell you that there is, on the one hand, our understanding of God and his role in creation. On the other hand there is human reason and logic.  Sometimes they may seem to contradict each other.  In these cases where our belief conflicts with our logic, we must improve both our understanding and our logic to reconcile the differences if we can. If not, we must not force our neighbors to bend to our own understanding of God, unless we can prove to them the error in their reason and logic first. I can understand and believe in a beginning. In fact, I assure you that I do believe that the universe was created.  But after long years of study, I assure you that I can not use human logic and reason to prove my belief. It would therefore be unjust of me to attempt to force anyone else to comply with my own understanding about a beginning. And therefore I made my just answer accordingly.” 


With expressions of frustrated agitation on most of the faces of the Christian Panel, the Master of Ceremonies stood to ask if there were any new answers to the Princess’s first question. The crowd was silent this time. So the Princess stood to ask her second question. 


“My Father The King, honored visitors, learned scholars and fellow Falatidans, if we can not be sure about the logic of a beginning to all things, then how can we defend the existence of a creator who supposedly caused that illogically constructed beginning?”


There were several groans from various places among the gathered audience. It seemed to many to be another restatement of the same question so the first few answers submitted were only attempts to re-argue the first question using the same arguments.  The Princess had little difficulty in pushing off those attempts for what they were, supposed answers to another question. One scholar from the right panel stood to provide what proved to be a somewhat compelling answer, at least it was endorsed by all five of the Christian theologians in that panel. 


“We are instructed to come to the Lord with the faith of a child, not the logical prowess of a philosopher! We believe in the existence and the continuing involvement of a creator God because our faith leads us to that position. It is the faith of the Christian Church that surpasses all earthly understanding, a faith that enables the doors to God’s Truth to be opened to us.” 


Because of the relative rank of the speaker, a Bishop from Rome with a wide reputation for doctrinal defense, Princess Sophia had to handle this argument quite carefully.  “Holy Father, I wish to thank you for that clarification. We all benefit from your grace and intellect in these proceedings and since I wish to understand, myself, your explanation, please forgive my follow-up questions which might help me to better understand your points.  So your argument is founded on the intrinsic idea that the faith of a person will lead them to God’s Truth.  Not the intrinsic logic or justice of the postulation, but the faith of an individual is the measure to use. Is this correct?”


The Bishop, still standing, simply and soberly bobbed his head one time in answer. The Princess continued, “Of course, our attempts today to find a just and logical foundation for the laws of our land are the very point of these proceedings. We are not at all concerned about the reasons one individual might choose to accept a particular religious doctrine. By virtue of the arguments we are having here today, it is quite evident that individuals might choose to believe any religious doctrine for reasons that move that person. With respect, my question, and the point of today’s test, has been to attempt to find a single just and logical reason to support the proposed religious edicts. If the best test of a religious idea is individual faith, then by what justice or logic may that individual be forced to accept another person’s faith?” 


At some point during the Princess’s reply the Bishop had retaken his seat and was now embroiled in a friendly conversation with the neighboring scholar in the next seat. He did not seem to hear Princess Sophia’s question, nor could he be retracted from his interesting conversation.   So the voting of the panels was counted, and again, five judges were convinced by the Bishop’s answer and five remained unconvinced. With that the second question remained unanswered. 


Master of Ceremonies stood again to quiet the crowd.  Then he turned to Princess Sophia asking her to continue with her third question. 


“My King, Countrymen, Scholars, and Visitors,” she began, “We can not prove through justice or logic that a beginning to time could have ever occurred, nor can we make a just and logical claim that a creator, an unmoved mover, was involved in such an unprovable event. So my third question is simple. “Under what just and logical authority should we coerce non-believers to accept a Christian version of the events of creation and the progress of subsequent history?”


This time there were far fewer attempts to answer this question.  The Crown Prince, however, emboldened with another bowl of wine, stood to answer. His Father turned his face away from his son’s direction, appearing to stare instead at the panel of Christian judges. Master of Ceremonies directed the crowd’s attention to Crown Prince Alfred. Who pointed out that the King’s edicts were by definition the law of the land and therefore just. And should the king determine that the Christian version of creation and history should be the law of the land, then non-believers may be justly coerced.” 


Princess Sofia smiled sweetly toward her brother, giving the impression that she was amused by his attempts to submit an answer in a grown up discussion. “Brother, and my future liege, your definition of justice might be argued. But I would suggest that your arguments should be respectfully directed toward our father and king as he authorized these proceedings to assist him in ensuring  the justice of his religious edicts be first shown before they are released as the law of the land. Our father, as has always been his wont, seeks to ascertain that our laws are not merely legal, but also just. This is why we are holding these tests today. And even if we determine, by some stretch of the definition of justice, that there can be no difference between a king’s edict and justice, a point that the king’s own involvement in today’s proceedings calls into doubt, then please remember we are not asking only about justice but also about logic. While the King might have the power to create, through edict, a just law, should he convert the illogical into logical by a similar pronouncement? Please remember, Brother, we are not here to ask if the King has these powers, not to ask if he can do these things. Today we are here to ask if he should do these things.”


With that the King said something to his son, hiding his mouth behind his hand while he spoke. The Crown Prince sat and said nothing more during the proceedings that day.  But the King then called to Master of Ceremonies, who climbed up to where King Alfred sat.  Master of Ceremonies bowed and listened to what the king said. The crowd could not hear any of these remarks or instructions so they waited patiently for Master of Ceremonies to return to the center of the stage. 


Once Master of Ceremonies had returned to the stage, he turned back to Princess Sofia and in a loud voice explained that her Father, the King, commands a change to the progress of today’s test.  The Princess is instructed to present both of her remaining questions to the crowd for potential answers. Then the judges shall vote on the final three questions and their answers. In this way the King hopes to shorten these proceedings and then to convene his standing panel of legal advisers for a reconsideration of the religious edicts. 


Sofia’s face gave no hint that she thought these changes to the proceedings presaged a victory. She presented her final two questions. “If the facts of creation, as relayed by the Christian traditions, come from times before the existence of human kind, then humans must have been told about creation by witnesses who predated human beings. Many generations of humans lived and died before they could have written a lasting version of creation as told to their ancestors by gods and angels, the only witnesses to the events in question, events  that we have already proven unable to support through logic. The accounts must have been handed down from generation to generation before finally being written. Why do we accept these third and fourth hand stories as facts, allowing for no errors of memory, misunderstanding, or exaggeration at all?”


She paused for only a few seconds, and then continued, “and my final question is simply a polite way of asking the learned scholars here assembled to help me consider arguments that I may have missed. My final question, today, is, are there any other just and logical arguments that  support the reliance and forced acceptance of the Christian religion, or for that matter ANY religious tradition over any other religious or non-religious doctrine?" 


These last questions did generate discussions, especially between the two panels of judges. The final question received the most potential answers, in terms of numbers. Many of the Christians on the judges panel thought somehow that a democratic show of hands should determine the doctrine of a region. Some even took the illogical position that Falatidan people were already Christian in fact, by virtue of some polling that showed some sixty-two percent of the population considered themselves Christians. Rabbi David countered this idea by pointing out that a religion founded on an individual’s faith, instead of any kind of provable logic, should not restrict the possibility of personal religious belief based on any kind of mob rule. A history professor, also on Rabbi David’s panel, pointed out that all religions begin as offshoots of more dominant religions. If a show of hands might justify the eradication of a new and therefore minority held doctrine, then all of the existing religions would have been snuffed out in their infancy.


The conversations went on for almost another hour. Finally the votes were taken and announced. All of  the members of the Christian panel voted that each of Princess Sofia’s questions had been justly and logically answered. All of the members of the non-Christian panel voted that not one of her questions had been justly and logically answered. 


The King and his family stood and filed out of the assembly, followed by ranking members of the court, visiting dignitaries, the two panels of judges, and finally the Princess and Master of Ceremonies. Within days, the religious edicts of the King had been retracted and Falatidan people enjoyed six more years of being the subjects of a multi-doctrinal kingdom.  For the most part, these were six good years of peace, prosperity, and even handed rule by a monarch known for efficient governance and toleration of differences among his subjects. 


Epilogue


Good King Alfred the Second was succeeded by his Son, Alfred the Third.  One year thereafter, a terrible war swept through Europe and lasted some thirty years. By some estimates, almost half of Europe’s population died of starvation, disease, or battle wounds during this long war which began as a schism in the Roman Catholic religion.  Alfred the Third announced that his subjects would henceforth also be Roman Catholic, that a universal draft would ensure that all males from fourteen to forty would be enlisted into the war effort to defend the Holy Catholic faith from the Protestants. 


Princess Sofia’s case remains a mystery.  No records of her subsequent voice in court survive. Neither does what had once been a voluminous correspondence with other educated female daughters and wives of European nobility. To be fair, few records have survived the upheavals of the next three decades. Persistent rumors place Sofia in a nunnery, almost as a prisoner being held incommunicado. Unfortunately, her reputation and, in fact, the history of her life, seem to culminate with her famous “five questions,” which became, for a few short months, the talk of the courts of Europe. 


Ironically, it was in the new King’s third year of rule that Falatid, and its formidable army found themselves placed under the protection of a Swedish General fighting under the banner of Roman Catholicism. Less than a year later, the war council from Sweden determined that the King of Sweden could more efficiently, as a war effort, govern Falatid. So the Pope presented Alfred with a new title, “Defender of the Faith” and his rule was converted into a form of administrative subordination to the King of Sweden. As the war ground on, agricultural efforts became lower priority than the war efforts. Starvation and attrition became common in the once prosperous towns and villages of the small kingdom once known as Falatid.


Before the war's end, the district known as Falatid disappeared from most maps. Nation States, instead of small kingdoms seemed to be the way of the future. Subjects became peasants. Nobility became freeholders. And the dominance of two offshoots of the Universal Roman Catholic Church became almost uncontested.


Monday, April 22, 2024

In Ancient Greek it's Heroic Hexameter

 

In Ancient Greek it’s Heroic Hexameter


By Joe Petrulionis


All rights to these materials are reserved by the author.






Tell us Goddess of the days we’ll hold…


“The immortals count them and you'll never be told.


But far below earth a shade you’ll be


As memories fade and bodies leave. 


A nice exit, no, you mortals get? 


No long goodbyes, no eternal regrets. 


But back on earth, while songs are sung


And glories logged in clay, skin, paper, and electro-magnetic rust


Your feats may be recalled, your names stay at hand


As your emboldened family reaches promised lands.”





Friday, October 6, 2023

And In This Corner

 And In This Corner 


When I was much younger and mostly confused

by my classmates their beliefs and their tales,

telling of gods who could in fact be moved

by simpering pleas delivered on knees

dressed to the nines with imponderable lines:

“the living god died for our sins,”

or, “the cross as symbol of a lily white nation.”

The emotional triggers not the truth of the facts 

seemed the point of the whole postulation.


In trunks and boots and terrible haircut

a wrestler roars to a mic

The bad guy approaches when the ref does not notice 

the good guy gets chair-conked from behind. 

Around the ring they each spring against ropes they propel,

a ballet of dizzying violence 

The crowd screams in delight the announcer narrates the fight

And good barely bypasses evil. 


Then Ma and Pa Masterrace line up for the rally in wheelchairs of red white and blue.

Asked to explain their distrust of Ukraine and their support for defunding NATO, 

Ma describes an equation, “enough is enough” and pa just says “lock em all up.” 

The guy on the stage expresses his rage at Congress, deep state, and media.

A tax dodging fraud from a family of grifters, he promised a wake for the woke.

Why they love him? Who knows. Why they trust him? Their news shows.

The screaming the threats the nose out of joint.

The brutality seems the whole point.


Craving a circus, we voted for clowns now we bitch that the Congress is broken. 

Far across the wide ocean, with a panel of buttons, a self controlled Putin looks up.

With somber demeanor and appropriate reserve, the dictator cracks a wry smile.


Monday, July 31, 2023

The State

A government hangs between two counterposed threads, a tug of war of sorts,
dangling between security expectations and peoples' adoring allegiance. 

Break one of these threads and the system fails. 
Tighten one too much and the system fails. 
Tighten both and the system fails.

 Best to loosely hang like a cameo pendant adorning Liberty's breast:
an elegant accessory on a near myth symbol.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Bored

Bored

By Joe Petrulionis



From the rude snip of the umbilical
to the hideous slurp of the aspirator,
human life a long phase of protracted monotony.

We come prepared by natural selection
designed for struggle, privation, challenge, and loss.
We find our well meaning ancestors devised
processes, procedures, regulations, and risk mitigation, all systems of entrapment, machines of enforcement.

Would have been better to be a jack rabbit.
Then a life of running, hiding, and nibbling at the edges of our predators' gardens
would be not only tolerable, but we might even imagine a kind of purpose in that form of existence.

As it is, we are made for the life of a human and
are instead bent and shaped for something less threatening, unbelievably boring. 

Monday, February 3, 2014

Click!

Click!


by Joe Petrulionis


When at last Empire falls, as all others before have also fallen,


when kitchen tables become the only schools,
when human rights become guidelines, deaths become collateral damage,
when the electorate is kept ignorant by its own secrecy laws, justified by fear for security,
when universities become enterprises and real estate development their primary mission,
when tunnels fill with ocean and damaged bridges carry only foot traffic,
when surplus produce on one coast fails to reach the hungry on the other,
when health care becomes the most lucrative investment available,
when mono-cultural food crops fail and infections quit responding to antibiotics,
when Deans and Physicians are compensated like industrial tycoons,
when categories, processes, and systems become more meaningful than individuals,
when the last no fly zone becomes unenforceable, despite its location over US Metro Areas,
when calculating machines are queried for ethical, legal, and artistic decisions,
when separatist energies finally pull apart essential national bindings,
when the invasion, from wherever it may come, finally achieves its beachhead,
and when tanks, enemy or domestic--what does it matter?-- police American intersections,


look for me in the bottom of that last viable foxhole.
When terms are offered I'll be the one with the Molotov Cocktail and disposable lighter.

Friday, November 11, 2011

Tiz the Season: Why an Angel sits atop the Christmas Tree

Tiz The Season: Why an Angel sits atop the Tree
--- By Joe Petrulionis

Halloween and all through the store,
Bing Crosby's _White Christmas_ played at a roar.
There just for candy, not decorations, not gifts,
but the store needed profits and the economy a lift.
The crowds were cantankerous, the cashiers rude,
To my, "Sir, Where's the candy?" the clerk said,
 "dunno Dude."
My temples were throbbing when I asked him the reason.
Sez, "Trick-or-treat candy was gone for the season."
"Its Halloween, surely you have candy to sell."
He answered in a language I don't know very well.
Then he pointed upstairs, with his middle finger;
and he growled so loudly I didn't dare linger.
Walked all around, never found the next floor;
But a half box of Snickers for sale by the door.
I snatched up a handful dashed to the express line.
A couple before me was having a hard time.
Their cards would not swipe, they needed a manager,
whose key would not fix it. I suggested a hammer.
The elderly wife looked sweetly in my face.
And blasted me point blank with pepper spray mace.
Then out on the lot there arose such a din,
run away shopping carts in hurricane winds.
I dodged and I dashed and I tried really hard.
Several carts broadsided my new smart car.
As I pulled into my drive and turned off my lights
some teenagers egged me and disappeared in the night.
As I stepped over the threshold I soon realized
that the snicker bars were still at the store in a bag.
So my mood was real bad when my wife got home
from her costume party she'd attended alone.
Dressed as a Victoria Secret Angel...yes, wings and all.
I stood there dumbfounded as she heeled down the hall,
dragging a fourteen foot scotch pine, yep newly cut.
She said only, "Darling, would you mind if we put the tree up?"
"It won't fit," I cried, "in our nine foot den,"
"So where do you want it," she asked with a grin.
And that's how that angel got up on the tree
all because Christmas does not start on Halloween!


This so called "poem" was first read at a Sigma Tau Delta (Honorary English Society) meeting at Penn State University--Altoona. Shown here are Joe and Sandy Petrulionis exhibiting their entries for the "ugly sweater" competition.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

My Favorite 911 Memorial


Walking around a bend of the Rennsteig (see my last post for a description of this wonderful foot trail in Germany), I came upon a stone memorial to a military engagement that occurred there in 1944.



This Memorial stands beside the Rennsteig Trail.



The world being full of these stone and iron reminders of the valor and bravery of "our side" in some past struggle between right and wrong, I usually just walk past them. Its not that I do not appreciate the sacrifices made by people who have come before me. It is just that I often think we memorialize the wrong things. Worse, these memorials sometimes preserve in the minds of yet another generation the idea that there were only two sides in any war, our side and "evil." Twice worse, evil would have prevailed had it not been for the military prowess of our side. War was the answer and the solution. It often seems "God Almighty" needed to borrow the United States Military for a few years because evil was getting a little too much for him to handle.















The "Other Side" as seen through propaganda posters. (Click on them to see them in more detail.)


Thrice worse, there is evidently some psychological need to dehumanize our enemy. In order to justify to ourselves the great wrongs we think we must accomplish to "win" a war, our enemy must not be imagined to be people. They have to be monsters, devils, animals...but not people. Else, how could we ever use nuclear weapons on cities, chemical weapons on agricultural efforts, "shock and awe" theatrics against civilian populations, torture against their soldiers whom we capture in battle. No, we must first think of the other side as somehow less than human. Then we can live with our actions, no matter how inhuman these actions may become.



                                                             Nuremberg 1945




                                               Camp x-Ray, Guantanamo, Cuba 2002



                                               Dachau Concentration Camp, Bavaria 1945









Bataan Philippeans 1942










Chemical Warfare against Agricultural Lands in Mekong Delta in 1970












Largely Civilian City, Nagasaki Japan in Fall and Summer of 1945







Mai Lai Vietnam in 1968









Resisting the urge to think of my own side as "right" and the other side as "evil," I normally just walk on by war monuments.

But this time I stopped and translated. I don't know why, perhaps I was tired and in need of a short break from hiking. But I stopped and translated.



The original monument explained simply, "In memory of the fallen American and German pilots in an air battle over the Thuringen Forest on September 11, 1944."

I thought to myself, "How interesting, how civilized, to include the attacking enemy flying over your homes in the memorial."





Then I read the explanatory sign positioned several meters away.

"On September 11, 1944, roaring through the sky of the Thuringen Forest, an air battle between the German troops and the Allies was underway. This battle involved 84 young men, six German ME 109 and two American P51 Mustang aircraft. The result was 5 deaths on the German side and 2 deaths on the American side. This memorial should remind us of this air battle so war does not ever repeat."












"The result was..." Now that was a nice touch!

This little battle was not amplified to have been the most important turning point between the progress of the forces of light over the forces of darkness. It was not reinterpreted as a strategic victory. The benefits, if any, gained by the loss of life are not listed. And the actions taken by the various pilots are not spun into heroic ballads. In fact, we do not even learn about the reasons the battle was fought. The result was seven dead young men.

Can we ever control that all too human need to conveniently de-humanize our enemies? I look forward to the day in the future when we will be far enough removed from current struggles "between good and evil." Perhaps we will even count the dead humans on all sides of our current wars when we sing the songs of triumph and claim to have "won" anything at all in return for their "sacrifices."